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Modern children from prosperous families have something that their peers of twenty years ago could only dream: expensive toys, good clothes, a separate room … To provide all this, parents, as a rule, have to work hard and hard. But instead of the expected gratitude, they have more and more often have to face protest, misunderstanding, irritation from the grown son or daughter. “Difficult age,” parents sigh doomedly, once again going to work.

Of course, age also makes itself felt. But he is not alone. I think these mothers and dads would be very surprised to learn that the problems of their well -dressed, deliciously fed and well -groomed children are largely the same as the orphans growing without parents and sometimes in very difficult household conditions.

It is these children who make up the main circle of my wards, and, communicating with them, I am constantly convinced: the physical loss of parents (drunk, dead or simply who left their son or daughter to the mercy of fate) and loss of contact with them are perceived by children almost the same. On the day after day, remaining under the supervision of a nanny or grandmother, not feeling an emotional connection with his father and mother, the child feels the same as the child who actually lost his family: he also suffers from loneliness and rejection https://www.icietmaintenant-france.com/popolnit-schet-na-pokerdom-menshii-deponent-kooptirovanie-ravnovesiia/, also blames himself for what happened, feels his own inferiority (“others love, but I do not!”).

However, if a teenager living in an orphanage, difficult life circumstances force to fight for life, then prosperous children begin to fight against their parents – even if in this way they try to attract their attention and achieve interest in themselves.

Lose contact with parents or lose them physically – these events children perceive almost the same

Of course, we love our children – sometimes sometimes we show our feelings in a way that is not clear to them. We, adults, have material benefits, which we ourselves were often deprived in childhood and who are now generously endowing our children so generously, seem to be an adequate equivalent of love. But the child – at any age – first of all, just needs live communication with his parents: it is in him that he draws self -confidence, builds his self -esteem on him, and formulates his own identity and vital values through him.

You should not be a maximalist – to establish or save contact with the child, we are not at all obliged to give up a career and sit with him until he starts his own family. Give your son or daughter ten minutes in the morning and hour in the evening – only seventy minutes of warm, trusting and natural communication in order to in the future they can appreciate what we gave them, and to use it competently, continue our business – or find our ownno less important and exciting.